We left for our morning walk at 5:32 this morning. Two minutes late and the whole walk felt wrong. It was like sleepwalking through the route. Like Karen, who sees the same folks on her morning walks, we pass three black pick-up trucks on their way to work. Now we wave at them and they toot their horns at us. The big, shiny one was late this morning also. Hahaha. Most houses have one light on by 5:45. I'd rather get up at 6:15 too, Karen, but then I couldn't walk with Jess.

Yesterday Jess texted me from work and asked me if I wanted to have "happy hour" when she got home. I said "yessss," and proceeded to create the most wonderful cocktail party for us. I roasted peppers on the grill, set out jalepeno stuffed olives and cherry tomatoes with homemade blue cheese dressing. I grilled baguette slices basted with olive oil and herbs, put out the last of Steve's famous hummus. Finally I grilled shrimp wrapped in prosciutto. It was the day's highlight.

Jessica's friend Kristin spent the night. Jess wasn't here but I had invited Kristin to stay any time to shave 45 minutes off her commute time to work. She brought her dinner from Pei Wei and we watched a documentary on HBO called In A Dream, about a mosaic artist in Philadelphia. I liked it. Why is it that the "real" artists are so crazy????? Jackson Pollack, Frida Kahlo, etc. This guy was the contemporary Van Gogh. He said he spends $50,000 a year on his art. I wonder where he gets the money, because I don't think anyone pays him for his public art.

Today the repair man comes to fix our dryer. Then I'm going to lunch with my sister, Leslie and we are buying a birthday gift for my mother. Sunday we are celebrating Mom's 80th birthday. I still see her as 55 and get annoyed when she acts "old." I think she's faking it. How's that for denial? That's ok. If she's 55, then that makes me 30.

I do not like the result of these short nights. I am so tired. Most of the time. Like NOW. I do like the 5:30 a.m. walks with Jess though. They are worth the tiredness that comes later. The walks are stimulating and refreshing. It is only 8:15 now and I've updated my facebook, emails, researched some glass techniques and classes. I'd like to have a little more structured routine, like Karen has. Actually, I'd just like more of a sense of accomplishment in a day. It all feels so random. Organizing my life is a favorite hobby so I should have no problem. Where I get dizzy is when it comes to my art. Of course it would help if I knew what I wanted from it, but I get clearer every time I work. So I'm going to process my thoughts here for a minute. I've given serious consideration to participating in craft shows. But I don't think I will. I make plates and dishes that make beautiful gifts, but they do not inspire me in the making. The last eight plates I made for wedding gifts bored me. The upside was that they were easy to make, I have the materials, and they are very nice. Making art is obviously different than punching out plates. There is nothing worse than having a crapload of inventory lying around that didn't sell. (I can't stand to look at my earring rack). I am daunted by the prospect of selling my artwork. But it's what I love to do, to make, to create. And it's always what I do best. Most of my "one of a kind" things have been commissioned or sold so I don't have much in my possession. Certainly I'd like to show my work in galleries, but I've got to have something to show and right now it's scarce.

Okay, well that helped a little. Today I will clean my studio. It's totally full of grout dust. The floor is filthy and the vacuum cleaner was clogged with stones from the concrete mix I tried to use. So first... clean the vacuum, then clean the studio, then make some cement slabs for my project.

It could be a busy day. I hope it's a happy one.

What a wonderful weekend. I hate to see it end. Steve is going back to work after a week's "staycation." It was nice having him home, which kind of surprised me. The house is MY domain during the week and I like having my space to myself. But Steve was so quiet and restful that it slowed me down too in a nice way.



Friday night we went to the O's game with Lynne and Doug and sat in our premium seats next to the dugout. It was a fabulous and memorable game. We sat behind (ex)Governor Erlich and about ten seats away from a football player, Chris McAlister. What a gracious and patient man he was, letting flocks of children be photographed with him as he was leaving. We stopped in at Lynne's house after the game and drank wine together until 1:30. It was such a happy night.

Saturday night Joy and Tim came over for dinner. They couldn't stay but three hours as they had to go home to their sick and dying dog. Joy's cat was recently run over by a car and her mom died a few months ago. I know this is really hard on her. Joy has become a wee bit reclusive so I'm glad they came for dinner. I made this fabulous salmon recipe with asparagus, white beans and maple syrup. I had to limit my appetizers because Joy will get so full that she won't eat her dinner. So I just bought a baguette and we made our own dipping sauces with Spanish olive oils, vinegar and spices. Very simple. They brought us a bottle of Camus Conundrum, the most awesome wine ever, and a malbec, which is my favorite red. They left at 10:00 and by 10:15 I was deeeeeeply asleep. Yummmm.

Yesterday Steve took me to Lowe's and we bought the products I need for my ArtQuest project. I'm making cement slabs to use as my canvases for an artwork of multiples. Carien, my art coach for this project, says I should make 50. I think she's crazy. I was thinking more like three. But I do like the idea of filling a wall with an installation. Perhaps I'll post my progress.

Well, off to Monday. Happy day!

Another fabulous early morning walk. They won't last forever. I know myself. I'm learning to fall asleep at night now so I'm more rested when 5:20 rolls around. I'm up to five hours now. It's no different for Jess. She gets in around midnight, then we talk, go to bed and get up at 5:20.

Today I actually have plans. Nancy is having a meeting for our ArtQuest group this morning. We are working on projects for a show this fall. Tonight Steve and I are going to a ball game. We are taking our neighbors, Lynne and Doug. Dinner will be a boring $15 crab cake and an overpriced beer. It's that or nachos with fake cheese glop.

Steve set up my sandblaster!!!! Hooooraaaaay. I just need to connect the vacuum and it's ready to go. I am so excited. I can't wait to start using it. I completely finished my mosaic mirrors yesterday...even put the hangers on them. I really love working and making things. It's so satisfying.

This morning Jess and I walked again at 5:30. It felt fabulous and yes!, I feel great. No aches and pains at all today. The air was cool from last night's rain. We walked vigorously and it felt so good to get stretched out and awakened while the sun was coming up.

This is crazy, but in the month I was feeling so awful I fused a lot of glass: eleven plates, three soap dishes, four coasters and three mosaic mirrors. The only position I was remotely "comfortable" in was standing, so I worked. I'm finishing up the mirrors now, cleaning the grout out of the crevices of the textured glass I used...Never again! I'm also working on a project for a show at Weisser this fall. It's my art piece of the year. I had a disturbing revelation yesterday. I realized that I made my favorite art piece nearly nine years ago. Ouch. That is NOT okay with me.

I had another little insight too. I've been thinking about where I want to go with my art...what I want to do with it. My options are craft shows vs. galleries. As I was making wedding gifts this month I realized how uninspired I am by making plates. They make beautiful gifts. They just don't do anything for me as an artist. Plates can make a great surface for art, but production bores me. Hey, maybe one day I'll find a craft show where I actually feel it's a fit for my art, but I don't think it's the direction for me. The one thing that appeals to me about shows is the social aspect. And I NEED to be around people. I think it's time to have a party.

Got up at 5:20 this morning to walk with Jess at 5:30. In anticipation of getting up three hours ahead of schedule, I didn't fall asleep until 4:30 and then had an hour of vivid dreams. But hey, I'm up and it's fine. We didn't talk much until the end of our walk. It was too early and we were both busy waking up. I shared a piece of my dream with Jess which lead to a conversation about choice versus options; commitment and freedom. It was pretty theoretical and yet deeply personal. Since she did the Landmark Forum, she has opened wide up about her "issues." She has given up defending her justifications for her concerns and has a new ability to see herself so clearly and to be coached. She is even more of a joy to be with. For my benefit we talked about the ordinariness of waiting to be inspired versus the extraordinariness of being inspiring. I'm still clutching to my ordinariness.

I've received the most wonderful compliments on my artwork recently. I made Garth a plate for a wedding gift and he said it was amazing and he'd had no idea I made things with glass. He asked if I had my own business. I hate that question. It brings up all my failed intentions. A friend of ours visited from Oregon and gave me the highest of all compliments. She said I'm doing EXACTLY what I should be doing. It's what I say when I see the work of a talented artist. So that gets me all heady, but I crash quickly when I am reminded of where I've quit on myself. I have this notion that it's so hard to do it alone.

Well, I still have an hour left before it's time to get up. Yeehaw. Thank you Karen for being an inspiration to me with your walking and Cheryl for getting up early yesterday. If you guys can do it, so can I!!!

I enjoy these mornings of chatting with Jess on facebook. I get to catch up with her on what she did last night as her schedule prevents me from seeing her much. She's out the door on the way to work by 6:30 a.m. Usually I get to see her briefly in the afternoon before her next life begins. She gets back home after I'm fast asleep. So these morning "chats" are good.

Steve is taking some vacation time this week and just staying home. I have to acknowledge him for staying away from his blackberry and iphone. So far so good. Yesterday I mowed the lawn and he trimmed the edges and trees. He dilled and canned some green beans. This morning he's out trimming the bushes. Mostly we've been real lazy. I made the BEST shrimp gazpacho last night. It was sooooo easy. It's a keeper and a recipe I will recreate for company.

I don't know what I'm doing today.

I thought about getting this finger slash stitched. I did. But then I remembered the last time I gashed myself. I called my doctor to see if they could evaluate the laceration. They said they were not equipped to do so and they suggested I go to the emergency room, which I did. The triage secretary wrapped my finger in gauze and I waited eight hours to see a practitioner. They took me behind my own private curtain, soaked my finger in peroxide for two more hours and sent me home. So, ten hours later, I still had to pay the $100 co-pay, but I did learn how to treat myself in the event of a very common industrial hazard. In my vocation slicing fingers is just a part of a day's work. This one just happened to be uglier than most. In addition, I'm on doxy for Lyme and it does thin the blood, thus clotting is more of an issue.

It's supposed to be hot today...98 degrees in the shade. I was hoping to have enough energy to finish mowing the lawn, but if I'm going out, I'd better do it now. We'll see.
Happy Monday!

ouch

I was checking my kiln last night at bedtime (after a movie and a few glasses of wine). Went to hit the light switch and in one sweeping motion sliced a two and a half inch gash down my middle finger on the glass I store below the switch. I was up until 4:30 a.m. holding my hand up high as the pains got worse shooting up to my armpit. I finally resorted to a pain medication and went to sleep. I think it's still working. No more pain. I did a peroxide soak on it this morning, dressed it in a nice bandage and I'm good to go. Just can't type worth a damn.

Some of you are way too loyal to me. . . and I love you for it. I checked my sitemeter and see that you have visited. I will post a little later today. Meanwhile, my happy news is that my nephew, Jeff, pitched for his high school baseball team for the state championship and WON. He also scored the winning run. He is amazing. I am still high from being there. It was a week ago.

I think it's time for a blog facelift. But not right now. I just returned from walking Oakleigh around the neighborhood path. I didn't think she'd make it. It's hot out. But I let her swim in the crick to cool off. So she's happy.

Today's my first day home from Scottsdale. I always love the first day back from a vacation. Being home feels fresh. Running errands is like visiting local friends. It's good to be home. I mowed a little more than half the lawn today before I thought I might die from some combination of heat stroke and fatigue. I am SO out of shape. At the Safeway I saw a man with the hugest, most beautiful black furry dog with white and brown on his face. I wanted to bend over and give that doggie a huge smooch, but I knew the pup was trying so hard to behave. So I just said a few ga ga dog words to make him smile.

BJ's was OUT OF LEMONS. . . a huge crisis when today's the day I'm starting my second round of detox. Meaning, I did it once before several months ago and I need a boost of self discipline to help me get back on the wagon of a healthy lifestyle. Can't start the day without lemons. Thank goodness for Trader Joes.

In Scottsdale, I was most impressed by how neat Annie keeps her house. Okay, so she lives alone. But I'm inspired, nonetheless, and am going to have a clean fest starting this afternoon. I'm looking forward to this week. I don't expect anything to rock my world. I'm just happy to be home again.

Facebook, making art, and Oakleigh have taken up what was all my blogging time. I miss posting photos, and chatting with you all. You are a community for me and I've dropped out. I think that's why we feel guilty when we don't post. We feel out of touch with a special group of friends. So maybe I could post an itty bitty bit more frequently. Something is better than nothing! Got to run now. I don't want to be late for my art class. xoxo

You Are Caramel deLites / Samosas

You are blessed with a brilliant, dynamic mind. It's sometimes hard to figure out what your focus should be. You're the type of person who does almost everything well. You are very competent but also unfocused. You're not an easy person to pin down. You are vibrantly complex. You have many facets to your personality, and they're often in competition with one another.

What Girl Scout Cookie Are You?

Well, this is a big shout out thank you to Cheryl for inviting me to join facebook. Tonight I found my best friend from when I was in high school. That sounds a bit awkward, but we went to different schools and knew each other through church and (shared/exchanged) boyfriends. God, I loved that girl. Yippee and thank you Cheryl!

A slide show was put together of photos of the accident Jessica was in. To see these pictures, you have to know that the car she was in absolutely should have been crushed and yet it received not a scratch. Her car is in the second photo, sitting between the two pick up trucks which are turned around. The cars around her took the hits from the oil tanker while she and her friends remained protected inside the car. Jess had just unbuckled her seatbelt and was about to make a run for it when she realized a hit would pin her against the guard rail. So she rebuckled and "bore down" awaiting the oncoming tanker. Another car miraculously settled itself between her car and the tanker and was hit in the rear and again, miraculously, nobody was hurt (by that particular event). Jess and her friends did not get home until late the next afternoon. The Red Cross put them up in a hotel while the highway was being cleared and the driveable cars were moved to a park & ride. Needless to say, we are all still processing this. Seems Jessica had the help of a few angels, or one really big one.

Today was a great day. It was my first day off detox. Hooraaay. I did it! Seven days without cheating. I didn't cheat today either, but the rules are a bit easier this week. This week I get to add protein and all the beans I want. I'm happy. I love beans. I still haven't salted anything, not even my egg. It was fine. I can't believe it. And I started exercising today. It was hopeless to even think about it last week. And I'd stopped a while ago anyway; but exercise is a part of this program which thrills me, as I have someone to account to. So I ran at the club and then came home and took Oakleigh for a long brisk walk. I have to say I feel fantastic. I might take a stab at swimming tomorrow.

Well, I need to go prepare dinner now. We're having salmon, white beans (Great Northern or whatever) and broccoli. Yummmmm. And five jalepeno stuffed olives. :-)

That's my girl (not the headline!!)

Monday, January 19, 2009

2 Dead in 40-Vehicle Pileup on Interstate 70

MYERSVILLE, Md. — A pileup of 35 cars and five tractor-trailers on a
snowy Maryland highway killed two people Monday and seriously injured
at least a dozen, state police said.

Snow was at least partly to blame for the 12:30 p.m. crash on
Interstate 70 near South Mountain in northwestern Maryland, said State
Police spokeswoman Elena Russo. An inch-and-a-half of snow quickly
fell around the same time as the pileup.

Twelve seriously injured people were taken to Washington County
Hospital, Russo said.

Late Monday, troopers said they were looking for a brown minivan,
which might have damage on the passenger side, that was traveling west
on I-70 shortly before the crash and left the scene.

State police said the minivan may have been involved in the initial
crash which led to the pileup.

Jessica Granek, 21, of Columbia, was driving west with three friends
to go skiing at Whitetail as visibility was getting worse from the
snow, which left a slushy mess on the ground.

"We started to see brake lights, and I saw a blue SUV turn hard and
become perpendicular to the road," Granek said. "That made everyone
put their brakes on and (they) started sliding. We were fortunate to
veer off the right side of road."

She described a scene "out of a movie or TV show" with cars spinning
out of control and "kept getting nailed from every side." Cars veered
off into a wooded area, and Granek saw a tractor-trailer that "flew by
everyone and went into the woods." An oil tanker jumped a guardrail.

Somehow, Granek's car was untouched. When a tanker narrowly missed it,
she and her friends ran into the woods away from the road. She called
911, and within minutes, emergency crews were on the scene.

Granek and her friends were among 71 people, including infants and the
elderly, who were taken to a Red Cross shelter in Washington County,
said Julie Barr-Strasburg, executive director of the county's Red
Cross chapter.

Most were waiting to retrieve their vehicles from the pileup, she
said. The Red Cross was prepared to keep the shelter open until at
least midnight, she said.

"We are in close contact with emergency management and we are hearing
that it will be quite some time before the road is open," she said
late Monday afternoon.

Most of the people taken to the shelter suffered from "bumps and
bruises" and received first aid, she said.

Yumm. This lemon water is so tasty. After today, the week of detox will be on the down slope, with only three days to go. The headaches are tolerable and I know they will be gone soon. Plus, I consider them a validation. Eating, if you can call it that, helps. Even when I'm hungry I don't have a big appetite. I'm thirsty and actually love drinking the water. I drink a lot of herb tea. It's allowed, but doesn't count in the eight glasses of water.

My night sweats are gone! No more early morning drenches. No sweats at all, actually. Hoooraaay. I feel fabulous in the mornings. As the day goes on my energy droops. My legs hurt. If it's not so bitter cold I'll go for a walk today. I'm going out to do some vegetable shopping later. I've got to get moving. I run up and down the stairs as much as I can and I'm doing lunges when I walk across my studio. My creativity is shot. I stand in my studio and stare at stuff. I'll stare at a project for an hour, then stare at another project. I actually hate my studio right now. I enjoy sudokus and crossword puzzles, but my concentration and focus just aren't there. I did un-decorate my Christmas tree last night so it's ready to put away. Steve and I watched a movie: The Tiger and the Snow. I really did enjoy it, and it only mildly annoyed me that he drank wine all night long next to me. He was far enough away to keep me from having to smell it. As I adjust to these changes, I'm able to stay up later at night. At first I was unable to cope with facing the void created by the absence of habit. But even by the third day I was feeling braver. I haven't tried reading a book yet. I look forward to it, since I have so many on my nightstand. I will also say I don't feel depressed at all, even in the bleakness of winter. Feeling tired and sore is very different from feeling depressed and unmotivated.

Has anybody out there ever detoxed? I'd love to hear the experiences of others.

Detox day three

Good morning! Today is day 3 of my "detox" week of (no) food. The day starts with warm lemon water. It's supposed to cleanse your liver. My liver is certainly due for a good scrubbing. This warm lemon water could be my favorite part of the day. For breakfast I get to eat raw vegetables. We are awakening our taste buds. For my first meal I had three strips of yellow pepper and a radish. The radish nearly burned my mouth out. Yesss!! We are awake! I didn't have any other vegetables in the house so that's what I ate. For lunch we eat raw vegetables. I'm getting to the point that I'd rather be hungry than face another green bean. For dinner I'm allowed to eat raw vegetables. I'm allowed to drink eight glasses of plain water each day and for a treat I get three fruits. Oh, and no salt, no sugar and nothing artificial. There are three things I'm allowed to roast and without them I'd just stay in bed and fast. They are winter squashes, beets, and spaghetti squash. I save these for my dinner and it's like eating heaven.

This is my fourth day without drinking wine and my third day of no caffeine. Steve has been wonderful to wait until I go to bed before he uncorks the zin. He was eating some crackers last night and I just had to go to bed rather than witness it. After-dinner-eating is my fatal flaw. I had no trouble whipping up a lasagna for Steve's dinner using the vegetables I bought for my diet. I'm happy for him to eat it while I eat my beet.

I've been going to bed early and waking up at 4:00 a.m. ready to party. But I know it's a bad idea to get up so I go back to sleep. Today I had a horrible headache every time I opened my eye, so I just went back to sleep.

I never ever could see myself doing anything like this. Like most of us, I choose the path of least discomfort. I was ready though. All the goodies I fed myself over the holidays disappointed me. It was time. It makes me feel like Superwoman, not in strength or agility, but in courage and self discipline. I CAN do it.

I think I 'm ready for a real post.

2009 began with a New Years Party that was heaven for me. I find entertaining to be very stressful and I rarely host parties any more. For fifteen years I flat out refused. Then I met Joy and Tim and we started a tradition of having each other to dinner once or twice a month. I enjoy their company so much and we are very relaxed together, although our meals tend to be somewhat "formal." We eat at the nice table and serve in courses with good wine. Thirty two guests came to my house for New Years... many neighbors, some I'd never met, Cheryl, Karen & Ken, a couple of family members and a few couples who have become a New Years tradition with us. The food was great, the people were wonderful. Nobody got sloppy or threw up on my front yard. Only the weather was wretched. It was sooo cold and icky. Most people walked here and had to negotiate the high winds coming and going.

I'm excited about the year ahead. Big changes are coming and I can't even see my way through them. I just know how ready I am. My calendar looks like a summer schedule, where every weekend is booked, only this time it's not the weekends. On Wednesday I'm starting a special diet called "Transitions." I believe more in changing eating habits than dieting, but this particular program begins aggressively and then the retraining begins. It's based on glycemic index, which on paper I believe is the most sensible way to eat. My relationship to food and managing my diet has always been a passion for me. I've done a lot of research on hormone balance with food and the glycemic index is the most sensible way to manage mood and well being as well as weight loss. It's not particularly easy, but what is? And I am ready for a challenge. So Wednesday is my first meeting of twelve and the beginning of a week of detox. Detox means eating only fruits, (raw) vegetables and herb tea for one week. We are going to save SO much money on wine and Starbucks, I'll be able to buy another mini cooper with the savings, providing I'm not in prison from the effects of withdrawal.

We had our first monthly Iron Chix meeting on Saturday. Iron Chix is an open group of about twenty women connected by friendships who are registered for the 2009 Iron Girl Triathlon . We will meet monthly, hire speakers who will talk about different aspects of Triathlon, such as how to change a flat tire and how to change your clothes really fast so as to save time. My neighbor Mary is the person who started the group last year with four other women. She and I met walking our dogs. The Iron Chix women get together when they can to train. I met three women who belong to my health club and we are going to swim and take classes together. A couple of other women get together and ride the bike course once a week when the winter weather breaks. I'll be there. It's a tough, hilly course. I used to ride it for pleasure. I was once quite the cycling beast.

I signed up for two glass classes starting in February. One is a class I've been wanting to take for a long time where I will learn a beautiful decorative technique. The second is a six week class focused more on creativity and art as a practice. A goal I have this year is to find ways to reduce the price of my product to make it more affordable. These products I intend to sell through etsy and indie craft mafia shows. A second goal is to show my higher end product in some local galleries.

My earrings are selling really well at Weisser Glass Studio in Kensington. The mirrors are moving more slowly, but then they are ten times the price of the earrings. I'm going to get some of them back and post them for sale on my website, which is ready to go except for I need more stuff on it. How ready is that?

Jessica and I have been working hard on our relationship... talking, talking, talking, talking, more talking, talking. It's hard but necessary for experiencing our love.We are doing really well and enjoying our hugs once again. I'm so happy to see the softness returned to her eyes. Steve's Europe travel starts up again this month, which has started to feel normal. He's been home a lot over the holidays and is progressing really nicely on making my glass cabinets.

I feel so fortunate to be facing a future that calls forth a good, healthy, positive lifestyle. I am lucky to have the freedom to focus on these goals and plans in a time that is so uncertain for so many friends. I send you all my very best wishes for this coming year ahead. I'm looking forward to reading your blogs!

thanks to Andi

Thank you Andi, for always providing something quick and fun to post. Please forgive my plagiarism.

Your Word is "Fearless"

You see life as your one chance to experience everything, and you just go for it! You believe the biggest risk is being afraid and missing out on something amazing. Sometimes your fearlessness means you're daring. You enjoy risky activities. And sometimes your fearlessness means you're courageous. You're brave enough to do the right thing, even when it's scary.

What's Your Word?